


Looking Back to All of Those Years (I Wouldn't Trade it for Anything)

by hyucklaugh



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Fluff, M/M, Noren, i want to write noren but i got stuck everytime help me, i'm so sorry if this didn't meet your taste, jaemin is mentioned a little, might or might not inspired from noren backhug in nct instagram, noren au, yukhei too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-09-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 12:09:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16062827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyucklaugh/pseuds/hyucklaugh
Summary: He couldn’t help but smile.Remembering all the drama that has happened.Tears have fallen in those moments, but he couldn’t be more thankful for everything that has happened.Because that’s what brings them to where they are now.





	Looking Back to All of Those Years (I Wouldn't Trade it for Anything)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: They belong to their parents, or SM. Can be both actually.
> 
> Might or might not be inspired by noren backhug in NCT instagram *cough cough*
> 
> Hope you like it and happy reading!

He couldn’t help but smile.

 

Remembering all the drama that has happened.

 

The realization.

 

The hope.

 

Jaemin.

 

The heartbreak.

 

The jealousy.

 

The confession.

 

Tears have fallen in those moments, but he couldn’t be more thankful for everything that has happened.

 

Because that’s what brings them to where they are now.

 

 

\---

 

 

**The realization**

 

_It happened so suddenly._

_As if he was standing in the middle of nowhere and lightning bolt just struck him out of nowhere._

_When he realized how beautiful Jeno’s smile is and how he wants to keep it to himself forever._

_He had known Jeno since he was five. What with them being neighbour when he moved to Seoul with his parents. Jeno is his first friend that approached the timid Renjun who hide behind her mother’s back when they greet the new neighbour. A kid who always give his eye-smile for free. Since then he had known that Jeno is someone he can trust._

_But what he feels now, it’s definitely not something someone should feel towards their long-life friend._

_Because the crazy thumping of his heart now is not something that can be considered as platonic._

_It didn’t happen in a special moment like what usually happen in mangas that he likes to read._

_It happened in a day just like any other day._

_Jeno is washing his father’s car in their front yard, clothes and hair wet from the water, and he’s smiling so bright he can put the sun on shame._

_And Renjun is dumbstruck._

_He was stunned in place._

_All seemed to be frozen, and all he can think of, all he can feel, is Jeno’s smile._

_One thing he knows for sure is that he has fallen for Jeno._

**The hope**

_He should stop, really._

_But he just couldn’t help but daydreaming about Jeno in his spare time (or all the time in all honesty)._

_The realization happened two years ago, during their summer break in second year of middle school._

_He thought at that time that maybe the feeling will go away as fast as it came._

_Boy how he was wrong._

_If anything, the feeling just keeps getting stronger._

_Jeno would sometimes tease him when he started to lost focus. The boy really had no idea that the cause of his friend stupid drooling face is the person himself._

“Yah Injun, what are you dreaming about in a broad daylight?” _he often ask teasingly with his additional eye-smile._

_God please forgive Renjun’s weak heart._

_He almost blurted out_ “You,” _everytime, but thankfully he can always stop himself before that one word comes out of his mouth._

_Because he’s afraid of Jeno’s reaction._

_He’s afraid of rejection._

_And the prospect of ruining their friendship just scared him so so much that he had decided to keep his feeling a secret for the rest of his life._

_So daydreaming is the only thing he can do._

_Because in his dream he can be with Jeno. Jeno is his and he is Jeno’s._

_If only dreams can turn into reality_

_But it will stay like that, keep hidden in the deepest part of his heart along with his feeling that keeps growing stronger each passing day._

**Jaemin**

 

_He can’t define his feeling that day._

_Or maybe he just refused to acknowledge the feeling because if he did, he would have scattered right away in front of Jeno._

_But it hurts._

_When Jeno came to his room, all smiling face and looked so ethereal (as always)._

_But he couldn’t understand any words that came out from Jeno’s mouth._

Nana.

 

Confession.

 

Reciprocated.

 

Date tomorrow.

 

His smile.

 

His smile.

 

His smile.

 

_His smile comes out automatically, but it doesn’t feel like he’s the one who smile._

_It’s as if he’s someone else who watch how Renjun is smiling so wide his cheeks hurt and hug Jeno immediately and say words of congratulations._

_But Jeno didn’t realize how Renjun’s hands that held his shirt so tight is trembling._

_Jeno didn’t realize the way Renjun closes his eyes as if to convince himself that this is only a dream._

_That his Jeno is someone else’s now._

**The pain**

_It was hard for him._

_So hard that he hope the earth could swallow him whole so he won’t have to feel the pain anymore._

_He tries so many times to convince himself that as long as Jeno is happy, he would be happy too._

_Because Jeno deserves all the happiness in this world._

_And Na Jaemin is the one who can give it to him._

_He often coming home feeling empty and so_ so _tired from all the pretense that he’s happy with Jeno’s newfound happiness in the form of a beautiful boy named Na Jaemin._

_He’s tired of pretending._

_But his dark room will be the only witness of his silent cry every night._

_And he keeps reminding himself, as long as Jeno is happy, then he would too._

_Even if it takes him forever._

**The heartbreak**

_Turns out it didn’t last forever._

_Distance is the one that ended it all._

_But not for good._

_Because what is good about holding Jeno while he cries himself to sleep?_

_What’s so good about seeing the love of your life being so heartbroken he locked himself in his room for days?_

_At first it was fine._

_The two of them didn’t enrolled to the same university because Nana got accepted into a prestigious university out of town._

_But Renjun stays with Jeno, following Jeno to the same university because he couldn’t bear the thought of Jeno being alone in a new place (even though honestly, he’s the one who’s afraid of a new place without Jeno). They even live in the same apartment now (courtesy of both their parents that think it will be good for them to stay together)._

_But as time flies, the distance strated to be unbearable._

_So unbearable that Nana decided that he can’t be with Jeno anymore._

_He thought seeing Jeno with someone else is the worst thing that could happen in his life._

_But seeing Jeno so heartbroken proves it wrong._

_It hurts so so much that he hopes he can rips his heart out so that he won’t have to feel it anymore._

_And it hurst more because there’s nothing he can do._

_His dark room is not the only spectator now. Jeno’s sob from the other room has become the company of his silent cries, and he hates it._

**The jealousy**

 

_Time heals._

_They’re in third year of university now, and Jeno is fine._

_It takes him weeks but he eventually let go. And accept that there’s just things that didn’t mean to happen._

_Renjun’s Jeno has come back now._

_And Renjun has found a new friend from his advanced class in university._

_His name is Yukhei._

_A really tall guy who’s really funny and easy going. And handsome too (really handsome actually, because he can turns heads when he walks so you know what I mean)._

_So no wonder he can enter Renjun’s life so easily._

_But Renjun is also confused._

_Because Jeno keeps giving Yukhei cold treatment._

_He confront Jeno about it once, but he said nothing and just goes into his room._

_And later on it resulted in them having a fight that ended up with apologize and ice cream from Jeno and an excuse that he’s only being weird so Renjun better forget about it._

_It became clear a few weeks later when Jeno drunkenly stumbled into their apartment and rambling about how he didn’t like Renjun being so close to Yukhei and that Renjun should get close to him only and that he didn’t understand why he felt that way._

_Renjun couldn’t help but feel hope blooming in his chest._

**The confession**

_If their story is like a  manga then it would have happened during their fight that sourced from Jeno’s jealousy and happened as a blurted out confession and ended up with heated up kiss session. Or Renjun accidentally confessing while crying his heart out that finally make Jeno realize his feeling towards Renjun. Because that’s how the readers would want it to happen._

_But it didn’t._

_It happened so normally and naturally as if it was meant to happen since the beginning._

_And it  happened in a very normal place too, in a park near their apartment._

_Renjun was sitting on a swing when Jeno suddenly kneel in front of him and hold his hands._

“Injunnie. My Injunnie. I’ve been thinking about it over and over again and I’m sure what I feel is real. I like you. No, I love you. And I understand if you don’t feel the same way because we’ve been friends for ages so you may think that it’s weird but believe me, I can only see a better future for us,” _he had said with the same expression he has after confessing to Jaemin._

_An expression so full of happiness and smile so wide his eyes has turn into crescent._

_And really, what more could Renjun ask for?_

_It’s something and everything he has ever wanted._

_So don’t blame him when they ended up on the ground after Renjun tackled Jeno and cries his heart out while holding his shirt tight._

_It’s like that time all over again._

_With Jeno smiling happily and Renjun who holds Jeno’s shirt tightly._

_But they’re together now._

_Jeno is his and he is Jeno’s._

\---

 

When a pair of arm sneaked around his waist he didn’t feel surprised.

 

He would have recognized those strong arms anywhere.

 

“What are you thinking about hm? Me?” Jeno asks teasingly while rests his chin on his shoulder.

 

Renjun swat his hand lightly and tries to free out of his grip, but Jeno just hold on tighter. Renjun just smile and pat Jeno’s head with his free hand.

 

“I just thought of what has happened before this. Before us. How we have come to this point. And I feel so happy with our life now,”

 

“Of course, who wouldn’t be happy with a husband as handsome as me?” Jeno said while laughing that earned him a pinch from Renjun.

 

But he’s right though.

 

Who wouldn’t be happy with a Lee Jeno as his husband right?

 

 

**FIN**

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so so sorryyy if you think that this is so random, lack many details, and all of the bad things you might found.  
> I just couldn't help but let my mind wander when I saw their pictures haha  
> Who else is screaming when seeing the pictures? Because I was pretty sure I looked crazy laughing alone in my room, but yeah. iT'S NOREN DUH.
> 
> I'm not an english native so forgive me for all the grammar mistakes. I need someone native to check it ugh.
> 
> Thank you for reading and have a good day!


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